This is: A)So I can brag about how hot I'm getting, B) Going to motivate me to keep it up because I'll be able to tell you about my new discoveries and awkward workout stories, and C) So I can share my knowledge with you about this lifetstyle change I'm about to embark upon. "Lifestyle change, Lauren?" Yes. Lifestyle change. New years resolutions are for people with no discipline that can't shut their eyes in the cookie section of the grocery story past January 10. Lifestyle changes are for people who really want to make a difference with a decision they're making.
My lifestyle change will include the following:
- Physical activity on very regular basis (because obviously when I get to Florence I need to be an AiLF--let linger in your mind for a minute)
- Cutting out most desserts, cheeses, and non-lean meats--Let me also vouch that if we go to get mexican food and I order a chimichanga smothered in white queso you may, by no means, judge me, you ass.
- Consuming more vegetables and preservative free/organic products--On a serious note: preservatives and shit are bad for you; vegetables, fruits, and whole grains are good for you. That's why I'm doing this. Please refrain from asking me stupid questions like: "I just don't understand why you shop at Whole Foods so much," or "Do you even have a reason for that?" Yes. I do. Don't be a douche. We'll talk later when I have an iron immune system and an infallible glow to my skin.
And probably some other things that I've forgotten to mention. So, let's get to getting fit.
To be frank, Running and I have never gotten along--unless I was running to a building that had a neon letters reading either "Pizza" or "Fresh Baked Cookies." Despite my recurring efforts to make it as far as my little legs could carry me, I always end up sounding like an asthmatic overweight ten year old and eventually having to stop and melodramatically throw my hands onto my knees in defeat. Not anymore, no sir. Today I, essentially, ran three whole miles. I walked a very minimal amount hence "essentially."
While I was running, it became clear to me what the key was to running...you have to shut yourself out. If you don't shut yourself out, then your brain constantly whispers in your wind burned ears things such as: "You really need to slowdown, champ," and "GOD YOUR LEGS HURT QUICK, STOP BEFORE THEY AMPUTATE THEMSELVES." That second one was less of a whisper, more of a yell.
As I was running today I began to feel something new. Don't get crazy, I just started to feel--great. I was enjoying my run. My lungs weren't pumping themselves into oblivion, my legs didn't hurt, and I didn't feel like passing cars were rubber necking at awkward style of running (which can sometimes look like I have no bones in my hands and that there are cinder blocks in both of my shoes). Finally--I feel like I can do this. I am so pumped.